As CEO of a company, you’re constantly analyzing how the business is doing from a data perspective. By looking at the data, you assess what trends are happening and if there are signs that things need to change to get the results you want.
The same applies to your drinking. Understanding the data around your drinking helps you recognize trends and any signs that things need to change. As the CEO, it’s important to know the results you want and then put strategies in place to get there. Test what works and pivot when the results are not coming.
In this episode, I’m walking you through how to be the CEO of your drinking, and essentially, your life. A CEO takes full responsibility of their results. I’ll help you to discover how to manage yourself in a way that gets results and lasting change. Step into your power and become the visionary of your relationship with alcohol, and your life.
You are listening to the Drink Less Lifestyle Podcast with Dr. Sherry Price, episode number 27.
Welcome to Drink Less Lifestyle, a podcast for successful women who want to change their relationship with alcohol. If you want to drink less, feel healthier and start loving life again you’re in the right place. Please remember that the information in this podcast does not constitute medical advice. Now, here’s your host, Dr. Sherry Price.
Well, hello my DLL ladies. That is my Drink Less Lifestyle ladies and men. I will find that I do get emails from men saying, “Hey, I know you only work with women but do you have someone that works with men?” And I’ve responded to those emails and yes, I do have counterparts that if you are male and you are looking for a coach I’ll link it in the show notes below where you can reach out to some gentlemen who help gentlemen in this area.
And I just want to say thank you for reaching out to me, thank you for being your own advocate on how to find and create the relationship that you want with alcohol and finding the people there in this world that can support you to do that. And I’m glad this podcast has been helping you along your journey as well. It really warms my heart to hear that so many people are finding it valuable. So thank you.
Please keep having your comments come in, please keep reaching out to me. I know some of you email me directly, some of you direct message me however is best. I just really enjoy hearing from you. And if you’re not a member of my private and free Facebook group I invite you to join us. We’re having some great conversations in there and I go live in there as well to answer questions.
And I’ll be doing an upcoming episode actually addressing questions. So I am gathering some of those now for an upcoming podcast because I really want you to start implementing what I’m discussing. And if there’s areas that are unfamiliar or still not quite crystal clear for you and you want feedback in that area or have a specific question I’d love to help address it for you. So please you can always write in on my Instagram page, you can follow me on Facebook or you can join our private Facebook page as well and just comment and let me know where you’re stuck and how I can help.
Because this is a journey that I don’t want anybody to feel that they have to do this alone and there are so many people on this journey to a better life, a more meaningful life and just feeling healthier overall.
Alright, so I want to dive right into today’s topic which is how to be the CEO of your drinking. Have you ever thought about it like that? I think when we go through life especially in our 20s drinking is – I don’t know, at least part of the social fabric that I grew up in, it was just part of what we did. And I didn’t really give it a second thought too much. But as I aged and as I found that it really wasn’t serving me in my life and looking at the relationship I had with it, I know that you can curate the relationship that you have with alcohol.
So I want you to think about it and approach it as being the CEO of your drinking because you really are the CEO of your life. We make decisions all the time about what we’re going to do. What we’re not going to do, how we’re going to dress, how we’re going to eat, what we’re going to put in our mouth, what we’re going to put on our body, what kind of car we’re going to drive, where we’re going to live, how many kids we’re going to have. All of those things we give a lot of thought to.
But I’m not sure we give a lot of thought to the relationship we have with alcohol until it feels like it’s out of control or it’s starting to control us. So even if you’re at the point where you feel it’s controlling you a little too much or a lot, I just want you to know you can change that relationship at any time. And I really think it comes down to having that mindset of I’m going to be in control of my drinking and my relationship with alcohol.
And it doesn’t have to come from this I’m going to beat it, I’m going to get control over it from this aggression or feeling like I need to do this for me, which can also feel not aggressive but right out of the gates can kind of feel defeatist. I need to get charge of this because I feel it’s taking over. And I want to come at it from a different way of just saying, “No, this is the relationship I want to have with it and I am the CEO of my drinking.” So putting it to this framework, I’m going to be comparing what a CEO does in terms of a business. And also drawing parallels to CEO of our drinking.
So number one, the CEO looks at the results of the company. It looks at the data and decides if it’s time to pivot or adjust accordingly. So as a CEO of a company you’re always analyzing how are our products doing? How are our services doing from a data perspective, a numbers perspective? Another way to think about this is if you were the CEO of a company what is the bottom line? What is the revenue? What’s our profit? What are the sales? What’s doing well and what isn’t doing well?
You would ask important questions like, “How profitable is our company? What’s the profit margin? How are these products trending? Are they trending up in sales or trending down in sales? Will the company meet its metrics at the end of the quarter or at the end of the year?” Now, when I was acting as the CEO in my company in the past these were questions I had to ask about my business because the CEO is results driven. And what the data or the numbers really tell us is what actually is going on. It’s painting that picture of what is actually happening.
It doesn’t matter how I feel about the products, it doesn’t matter how I feel about the service. It doesn’t matter that I love this product line. We can’t get rid of it. I’m so in love with it. That’s an emotional decision-making process. And that’s only going to obscure what the results are telling me. If the results are telling me none of the customers really like this, nobody’s really buying it. Then as a CEO the appropriate action to take would be to believe the numbers and not believe the emotions.
Because as I like to think about it the data is the data, it just is, we don’t have to get emotional about it at all. And actually our emotions can cloud what we should be doing objectively. They make us more subjective rather than objective.
Now, think about this when it comes to overdrinking, a lot of the reason we over-drink is because it’s very emotional. And it’s the way we’re thinking about it, it’s our thoughts about the alcohol, I just deserve more because I had a long day. It was a rough day. Today I got some bad news, or it was very stressful. So it’s very emotionally driven. And that’s not how CEOs act. They take the emotion and they put it aside and they just evaluate what’s the data, how much am I drinking? How often am I drinking? What is the quantity I’m drinking?
They look at the actual data and they don’t make it mean anything about them. So looking at the data, it’s just not the quantity of the alcohol, or the frequency, or the amount of hours we’re drinking versus not drinking. It’s also all the other things. When I drink, am I more disconnected with my family or am I more connected? Or what is my relationship once I start drinking with others in my household if I live with others? What’s my relationship with myself when I over-drink, is that positive, is that neutral, is that negative?
Is that relationship affected while I’m drinking, once I stop drinking? What’s the relationship to myself the next day after I’ve over-drank? What is the relationship or the results alcohol is getting me in terms of my physical health? Is it preventing me or helping me stay at a certain weight? Is it improving my skin or not improving my skin? Is it leading to better sleep or quicker able to fall asleep but then can’t stay asleep?
So what is the impact it’s having on all the areas of my life, my relationships, my sleep, my skin, my cognition, my trust in myself, my ability to say what I’m going to do, my productivity, my motivation? I’m just bringing up all these areas that I felt alcohol too much of it negatively impacted those areas.
Yes, it would help me fall asleep, aka pass out. But I found that the quality of my sleep was not there. I found that I would wake-up frequently around three or four in the morning just staring at the wall knowing I am tired but I couldn’t go back to sleep. And I knew that was the alcohol because the nights I didn’t over-drink that would not happen to me.
And here’s another area, how do I feel about me when I over-drink, is this something that I’m proud of, meaning, yes, I love when I over-drink even when I’m doing it? Or is it the way I’m just able to tolerate myself because I’m so disappointed in other areas of my life and I just want to cover it up with some alcohol?
Now, some of you may hear this and some of you may hear these questions and the answer you get back I just want you to think about as just being an observer of those data that’s coming back. I don’t want you to go into judgment mode. I don’t want you to say, “Yes, I know all of this. And I know I shouldn’t do that.”
Now, if you do that just realize you start shutting yourself down from being objective. It’s analogous to a CEO looking at the numbers and saying, “Yes, I knew that product would be a flop. I knew sales would be down because customers aren’t buying this time of year because of x, y and z.” Adding judgment to the data is not really helpful. All is we want to know is what the data is showing us. We don’t need to add more story to it, more color to the story, all is we do is want to be just purely objective.
Now, realize if you call yourself a wino, or you say, “Alcohol is my friend.” All of that is going to again cloud the objectivity of your actual behavior. And here’s why I think it’s important to look at this. Because if you’re a CEO of a company and you’re not looking at the data let’s just say, you just keep spending, keep hiring, keep doing and you’re not evaluating the actions, you’re not evaluating the sales.
Then at some point it could quite possibly be if we’re not looking at any of the data that the company could go bankrupt because we don’t know what cash flow in looks like if we’re not paying attention to it. And that’s equivalent to a CEO hitting rock bottom, meaning that the company tanked and now they run bankrupt. There’s no money to pay anything.
Now, should the CEO had seen and looked at the data along the way there would have been warning signs, red flags to say, “Hey, we don’t have to hit bankruptcy. Let’s get help. Let’s get another person’s opinion. Let’s talk to our board of directors, let’s see what they’re thinking. Let’s get input so that we can rectify this downward trajectory.”
Now, if the CEO wasn’t paying attention to the sales, and the numbers, and the data, and the company was going into financial bankruptcy, trending down that way of course the CEO she might get fired. Or people would step in and help the CEO to turn things around. And I want you to think about when people step in to help to turn things around, who benefits? The CEO benefits, the customers who are really enjoying the products and services now are going to benefit because the company is going to be around longer because they’re reversing this downward trend.
The employees that work for the company are going to benefit because they’re not going to be laid off. They’re going to be able to maintain their jobs. So when you get help and accept help everybody wins in that scenario and quite frankly in the same in life.
So the reason I mention this is because a lot of us are under the philosophy, I want to help myself. And that sounds very noble. And of course we might buy into that philosophy even more if we want to be more secretive or private about it. But you can get help secretively or privately, you don’t have to broadcast it to the whole world. You can still get help.
And here’s what I find is if you don’t get help and you continue spending money if you’re the CEO of the company, or you continue overdrinking that’s a very selfish thing to do. Because I know in our minds as an over-drinker you see it as it’s just harming me. But you’re also harming all the relationships in your life or anybody that’s dependent on you.
And I necessarily didn’t see this at first because I thought alcohol was truly helping me. I really thought it was mommy’s little helper. But when I understood I was prioritizing my own emotions and how I felt and justifying the drink and saying, “Yeah, I just want it, it will help me. And if it helps me that means I’m more calm and I’m more calm for the people around me.” It actually wasn’t the truth. It was just the picture my brain was telling me to justify continuing my drinking.
And I know for me it took me a little bit to think about how I might be harming others because I thought really it was my own journey. I was only harming myself. And I actually didn’t see it was ‘harming me’, I really thought for the longest time it was helping me. But now of course being on the other side or being away from that much alcohol intake for myself I can really see hindsight how it was a barrier. How it was hurting my relationships. How it was hurting my health. I just really wasn’t ready to be objective with that while I was overdrinking for many years.
And I just share that because I know you may be in that spot too. You might say, “When Covid’s over, or when I get through this thing, or when this stress passes.” And I just want your brain to be onto itself that it doesn’t have to wait if you choose not to wait. And if there’s some reason that’s holding you back from taking the plunge of getting help or trying these strategies in your life, I just want you to be really honest with yourself. You don’t have to be honest with others but just be truly honest with yourself because as the saying goes, truth sets us free.
So I had to be willing to call BS on my own brain when it told me I was a better mom, I’d be able to better manage my emotions, everything’s just better with a couple of glasses of wine. I’m more social when I have more wine, when I’m out with friends, or I’m more tolerable at home with myself. Or it’s my period and that’s exactly why I need it now, instead of taking more ibuprofen I’m just going to have a few more glasses of wine to number the pain. Like all of these reasons.
That I just really had to tell my brain, “Enough is enough. These are all BS reasons.” One of the greatest ones I hear and I experienced myself was it’s my transition time from work to home. Or it’s my transition time from the end of my day to start dinner. It’s just my transition time. It’s my ritual that gets me from one mindset to the other mindset.
And I just want to call BS on this one too because you know what? When you start cooking dinner, or now that you’re out of your ‘work mode’ and into home life mode, you know what? Your brain’s going to transition without the alcohol. Trust me, it will. It might take a little longer. You might not have the ritual and the symbolic drink in your hand but your brain will transition without it just fine. It doesn’t need the help we think it needs.
So once I quit my emotional mental drama and I really started to see the results of too much alcohol in my life in more of an objective manner, I was able to get the help I needed. And I’m so glad I did because not only did I benefit and my health, and my skin, and all the things, and my sleep but also my relationships in my life. Because I’ll tell you what my friends, the results don’t lie. We can justify it, we can cover it up, we can push it under the rug, we can do all these things. But at the end of the day the results don’t lie.
And here’s the thing, with Covid so many people’s drinking is trending up, is going in the wrong direction, is going more and more or starting earlier in the day. And that’s no reason to be ashamed of yourself; it’s just a warning that hey, maybe I do need help. Maybe I do need support. And instead of denying what we don’t want to see or covering it up, let’s just see it for what it is. Let’s just call it the trend that it is. And then we get to decide what we want to do from there. But here’s what doesn’t serve us is running away from the truth, not looking at the truth, not being willing to see it for what it is.
Alright, so as a CEO a second thing they do is that they are in charge and they call all the shots, Pun intended. So once the CEO knows the data, understands the company’s profitability and financial standing she puts a plan in place. They’re ready to execute. They know what needs to be done. They know if they’re on course or off course. And if they’re on course, hit the gas. If they’re off course, let’s do a new strategy, let’s do different tactics. Let’s pivot and adjust accordingly because that CEO wants to see her company profitable.
If the company’s profitable, if the company’s doing well all the employees get to benefit. She gets to benefit. The customers benefit. So winning in one area means winning in so many other areas, and so by calling the shots you are saying, “This is what needs to be done.” You’re looking at what strategies help you and what strategies and tactics don’t help.
Maybe you’re looking at the data and you see geographically trends are going up and then in other geographic locations trends are going down. So we know it’s working in one area or one market but we need to figure out why we can’t replicate that in other markets. The same thing with someone who over-drinks, we look at the data and then we say, “Okay, is it a time to execute a different strategy? Is this the relationship I want to have with alcohol? Do I feel in control? Am I calling the shots? Do I feel good about my sleep, my health, all the things, the relationships in my life?”
And if we are overdrinking and the answer’s, yeah, no, I’m not happy with these results, I want better or different results then we’ve got to take different actions and different strategies. And if you go back through the podcasts, I’ve taught different strategies that you could be taking and one big one is setting a drink plan. It’s allowing the brain to see the GPS of where we’re going with our alcohol consumption. And you could go back to episode 11 if you want to review that podcast.
So this means you are planning your drinks ahead of time, not in the moment, not when you get done with your day. It’s not a moment by moment decision. It’s a decision made ahead of time. And as I mentioned in that podcast you need to do it at least 24 hours in advance of when you’re going to enjoy the drink. So if your drink plans says zero for that night it doesn’t matter what emotions come up during the day telling you that you should have a drink tonight.
Now, we talked about in a different episode how to manage those emotions when they come up, just like a CEO may say, “Well, I don’t really want to let go of that employee”, because we find out it’s an employee thing, not a product or a service thing, or other tactic that needs to be done. We need to let the employee go. And the CEO is going to be like, “No, I really don’t want to do that.” And of course they feel that way. Nobody wants to fire an employee. But you don’t base your decisions on emotions if you are after the result.
Now, I don’t mean to sound coldblooded or anything like that but there’s ways you can do it tactfully, there’s ways you can do it where it doesn’t sting both parties. You can let somebody off and help them find a job or you can tell them you can only pay them for up until this day. There’s ways you can do it in a caring kind manner.
Just like there’s ways you can handle yourself when you’re having desires and urges in a caring kind manner, that’s actually going to diffuse the urge and cravings that I talked about in a previous podcast rather than intensify them. Rather than feeling like I can’t pay attention to my emotions. It’s not that I’m saying you can’t pay attention to your emotions. Actually you should pay attention to your emotions.
What I’m saying is you don’t make your decisions based on your emotions in the moment. Because then we turn into emotional drinkers which is why most people develop an overdrinking habit. So of course when you set the plan and it comes to execute the plan you might think when you’re executing it, this is a terrible idea. Because any time the brain has to do something new, it fights it. It’s like I don’t want to change, this was comfortable over here. Now you’re asking me to do something different.
Just like at our jobs, we’ve always done something by PowerPoint and now we’ve got to switch to Keynote or whatever new technology, the brain’s going to fight it. The brain’s going to be like, “Well, it wasn’t so bad with the old system”, or whatever it is. The brain just becomes attached to what is familiar. That’s not to say the new direction is bad or wrong. It just is going to feel uncomfortable.
And remember the drink plan is there to help you. It’s not there to admonish you. It’s not there to make you feel bad. It’s just a sheet of paper. It’s just a tool just like Microsoft Word or Excel, they’re just tools. And you know what’s so powerful about them is that they organize data and that’s what a drink plan does. It organizes data so the brain can clearly see its direction and how it needs to execute. And the brain loves logic. Well, parts of the brain love logic.
So it’s not like the sheet of paper or this drink plan is the magical answer, it’s just a tool that you can utilize to watch the data, monitor the data and execute accordingly, just like Word or just like Excel allows us to organize information and analyze it from a logical perspective. Now, what some people do is they get mad at it like I mentioned, it’s just a sheet of paper. You don’t have to get emotional over it. It’s just the plan.
I’m not saying you’re not supposed to have emotions but we don’t need to have emotions against the plan because that’s going to defeat what we’re trying to accomplish because we really want the results. And here’s what I find some people do is they make a plan and that’s really the plan. Think about it as set in stone, it’s like cement. You make the plan and you forget about it. As I like to say, you set it and forget it. It’s supposed to give you mental freedom.
But here’s what I find people want to do, they want to negotiate with the plan. They’re like, “Yeah, on Sunday, I said on Tuesday I’d have zero drinks but now that it’s Tuesday I think we should talk about this again. I think this is up for negotiation.” But I have to tell you it’s not. You’re defeating how the plan should work.
It’s like having your annual review at work and your boss says, “This is your salary, or you got a percentage increase.” And then you go to your boss every week and you say, “Yeah, can we renegotiate that again? I know we set that in stone a couple of months ago but I want to renegotiate it.” Now, I’m not saying never to do this, but we don’t go to the boss every week and say, “Yeah, I want to renegotiate that”, or even every day some people want to renegotiate that number on the drink plan every day. But no, that doesn’t give you mental freedom.
That’s not why we have a drink plan is to renegotiate it. And if you’re doing that you’re not utilizing the tool the way it was structured and meant to be utilized. And what the beautiful thing about a drink plan is, is that it executes your higher power brain. If you back to my initial podcast as I talk about, your primitive brain is your in the moment brain, your emotional brain, it’s always going to want what it wants and it’s always going to want instant gratification.
The reason we put together a drink plan is to execute the higher brain, the human brain, the prefrontal cortex, the logic brain, the ones that’s more invested in your health than how you feel at 5 o’clock on any given day of the week. And by following that drink plan we are strengthening that part of the brain. We are doing muscle reps for that part of the brain. So that that part of the brain feels more empowered over time, it’s more in control.
So the more you honor the drink plan the better you get at planning and the better this tool becomes. But even better, the more you start mentally programming your brain differently for less desire because anything that you do over and over gets easier. So I did my drink plan for months, I wanted to get really good at being in control of my drinking and that meant I had to look at my results. That meant I had to put a drink plan in place for my benefit to get the results I wanted in my life and for me to understand the emotions that come along with that.
And then the awesome side benefit that came out of that is now I know how to use my brain for me rather than use my brain against me which is what I was doing for a long time. So once my brain understood, we had a plan and it was non-negotiable then it’s like I love knowing when I could drink and when I’m not going to drink. This is great. I can plan accordingly other activities around my life. It wasn’t that I planned the activities and then I’m like that’s my excuse to drink.
No, my drink plan was front and foremost and my highest priority because I was telling my brain, “We are in charge, brain, not the drink.” It’s never about the alcohol, it’s about us, it’s about us being in control and keeping our power. And over time my brain saw how satisfied we were, how satisfied we were with less alcohol. How alcohol was really not important, how, wait, I have these emotions and let me learn from these emotions. Let me learn how to deal with them and cope with them in different ways that actually fill me up and feel healthy.
And now when I drink I savor the drink. I’m not gulping it down rushing to get to the next drink. It’s not about the drink. It’s about the experience I have. Now, this might not make sense if you’re overdrinking, but trust me, when you cut back you will learn how you are satisfied with less and how to savor those moments more. And you know how I feel about the drink plan, there should definitely be days on there where there is no alcohol.
So I call those zero drink days because you really want to get your brain and your body used to not having it around all the time, meaning the same time every day or the same activity all the time is when I get to drink. That’s how we break habits. We have to have these pattern interrupts. So again I think the drink plan is an essential tool that you can use to master your mind and really understand how to strengthen that muscle inside your brain.
Okay, so back to what else the CEO does. Remember different results require different actions. So get crystal clear on this, and clarity is so beautiful and it’s such a great gift because when you’re really clear on something with your mind, you then create a path to get it.
So to me when I have clarity, that feels good and what I mean by this is really looking back in time and seeing what worked for you and what didn’t, because what other tools have you utilized that have been successful or beneficial to you? And equally, what tools have you used in the past that really haven’t helped and why?
So I’ve talked about on previous podcasts I’ve always done dry Januarys and I’ve done so many sober Octobers. Those were two months out of the year that I was pretty much guaranteed I wouldn’t touch alcohol. And I didn’t even drink one drink during those months. So when I did my analysis I’m thinking back to those times and I’m like it’s very interesting that I didn’t drink for those 31 days in both of those months. However come February 1st and November 1st I did drink. So on one hand it was effective, but on the other hand it wasn’t effective in my mind.
So what was effective about it? I’ll tell you what my brain liked. My brain liked that it was only a short stint. My brain understood that I can do this for 30 or 31 days but yet I get to indulge when those days are done. So my brain saw that I can do a short term commitment but I really was lacking on the long term commitment. My brain also understood in January and October what relationship we were having with alcohol, we were not having any. But my brain didn’t understand what relationship was I wanting when those months were over. I never thought about that.
What relationship did I want to have when those months were done? I never even considered those thoughts. I never put a plan into place. So it was like I was living these two months as alcohol free months and then I had no idea what I was supposed to do the rest of the year to cut back because that’s how I acted and those were my results. I just knew what I didn’t want my relationship to look like. But I was never able to get clarity around what I did want it to look like.
And I find a lot of my clients will tell me the same thing. They just say, “I want to be a social drinker?” Well, how social? How often, every social activity, daytime, nighttime, weekdays, weekends? And it’s not to get into the nitty gritty of each social activity but there’s not even parameters of what you want your drinking lifestyle to look like. And that’s the detriment there because remember the brain loves a GPS. The brain loves to know where it’s going and how it’s going to get there. And if it doesn’t know where it’s going it’s certainly not going to know how to get there.
So I didn’t even know that you can create a relationship with alcohol and that that came from you. Again I always thought it came from the alcohol. So when I learned that that was a thing I was so excited because I’m like, “Wait, I could be in charge of that? That’s amazing. How come nobody told me this before?” Nobody told me I could be the CEO of my drinking. Now, I didn’t learn it in those terms per se but now that I know I can, it’s so freeing.
And that’s what made me want to sign up and learn from a coach. I’m like, “How do I do this? I want in. I want to know more”, because she was able to help me describe things that I couldn’t describe for myself and utilize tools to get me there.
Now, I want to tell you a little story. It’s a little tangent but I want to share this with you. A few weeks ago I had my colors done. I never knew this was a thing until I read about it on the internet. Have you ever had your colors done? I was so intrigued so I Googled it and the more I learned about it the more I was intrigued because I never knew this was a thing.
So I met a lady here in San Diego where I live and I signed up to have my colors done. And when I showed up for the appointment, I just have to tell you we had such a lovely time. It was amazing. We bonded like we were old friends. We just got along. We just chatted the whole time. And maybe because it’s Covid and I’ve been pretty much locked in my house and not going anywhere and talking to many people that it felt just so good to meet with somebody personally.
So when I met with her the questions she asked me were such good questions. And the analysis was spot on to why I was feeling the way I was feeling. She was able to put into words what I was feeling but I couldn’t really articulate. And my brain was having a hard time coming up with the right words. And what I realized within the hours that she worked with me, she helped me create a different relationship with my wardrobe.
She put on all these beautiful colors and we saw what lights up my skin and what doesn’t. What makes me bring out my best, what makes me feel vibrant and alive. And she was able to articulate it in a way that I wasn’t able to see before. And I realized in that moment that that’s the same experience clients tell me that they have with working with me is that they listen to my podcasts. They get tips when they get stuck. And then when they enter my programs they’re able to articulate and really understand how to create a different relationship with alcohol.
Because you’ll notice in my programs I’m also asking questions of you because I don’t know what relationship you want. But once you answer certain questions then you’re able to devise a path to get there and create that relationship you want. You’re able to get the results. And that’s exactly what I do inside my group coaching program is I get to tailor the information based on your needs, based on your wants, based on what you want to get from the program and the relationship you want to create.
So I loved working with this woman because she helped me see what I was doing that wasn’t serving me, where I was buying clothes based on price rather than based on how they felt and how they looked on me. She looked at my body architecture and just by creating this outline and this capsule of what I really am drawn to and why, she’s going to save me so much money in the future on purchases that I would just be filling my closet with stuff, that really wouldn’t bring out my best.
And here’s the thing, she gave me that freedom and that fun again with my style and my wardrobe. It was so worth the investment.
So back to the concept of your strategy and your tactics, as the CEO you call the shots. You call the execution. You have to have the right plan and strategy in place in order to know that you’re going to get the result that you want. And maybe you need help with this. Maybe you need a coach to help you show you the way. Maybe you need additional tools that you can add to your arsenal.
But I’ll tell you what, as the CEO it is your responsibility to find the solutions and create the path that works for you. So I’d like to remind you Miss CEO, it’s your turn to call the shots. And remember, every problem, every single one of them has a solution.
Alright, moving on to three, as the CEO of a company they always have a vision and they use language to share that vision with themselves as well as everyone who’s following them and the board of directors. So words that they articulate this vision are extremely important because why do you think we have language? Why does it even exist? It’s for us to be able to communicate to ourselves and to others. So language is for communication, for better understanding, to use the right word to communicate what we really mean to the best of our ability.
Language is for us and it’s for others so that we can be more effective in describing and discussing who we are and where we are going. And we just think to the days where we were just grunting at each other. And grunts can only get you so far, they don’t communicate very well or very much. And then we had hieroglyphics and cave drawings. That can only communicate so much. That was so limited in capacity to communicate and really provide all the meaning that we have around something.
And what words so beautifully do is they really engage the emotional center, that limbic system I was talking about earlier. And when you engage that limbic system and it’s emotional you really increase the meaningfulness of this for yourself. This is what really starts to create motivation and other feelings that get you going on this journey. It’s why I’d like you to consider having this commitment to yourselves. But when I say commitment, your emotional commitment, why does this make you emotional?
How can this be more emotional? Meaning more meaningful for you because when you want to live a drink less lifestyle, why is that? Now, I do all my calls on Zoom and when I ask the questions of the ladies in the group I can see with their bodies how they communicate something. And you know it’s emotional when they relax into it, when their shoulders come down, when their face softens, when they get teary eyed, when it really hits them in their limbic system emotionally. That’s so much more powerful.
And that creates a more powerful vision for yourself on why you’re going to do this execution and what it means, sometimes it can be the tone of their voice. And then I look for those empty commitments, meaning those judging commitments, those commitments that we say and we feel that they should make us feel good, but they don’t. They’re negatively charged emotional commitments.
And so when I’m asking my clients a question such as, “Well, why do you want to drink less?” And if I hear answers such as, “Well, it’s the right thing to do.” Or, “It’s what I should do.” Or, “I know it would be good for my health.” And it’s almost like they tense up, or their shoulders even come up, or their face gets kind of stiff and stern because it’s like they’re saying it and they want to believe that and they kind of believe that, but it brings up so much tension in their body.
And with that type of emotional commitment it’s only going to get in your way because it’s negatively charged, meaning it’s not getting you motivated to take action to a drink less lifestyle. It’s actually getting in your way. So we’ve got to connect with the emotional component that actually frees you up and starts moving you in the direction you want to be going. And it feels good. Look, drinking less shouldn’t be stressing you out. It should be a little bit freeing and elating if you’re doing it for yourself, for the right reasons, not that you should, not that you are berating yourself along the way.
So find an emotional connection to wanting to drink less for you, one that feels good inside of you. Sometimes I worry that we aren’t connecting with that part of us that wants something, because we’re afraid of failure. We’re afraid of our fear. And let me tell you that’s just going to hold you back even more.
So if you’re reaching out for help because you don’t feel you can do this on your own, or you want tools and tactics to get this done in a pretty expeditious manner, and you’re looking for female companionship with other women who get it and understand you. And you have that safe space so that you can explore this habit without being judged then you owe it to yourself to discover why this is important to you and to have the right words and create the right vision that’s going to motivate you.
So I want to help you discover that for you because when we can clearly articulate our why in a meaningful way we can really achieve so much more. Actually we can achieve anything. And do you ever notice that the right language motivates your brain and your body? Ever listened to a motivational speaker and afterwards you’re just so ready to take action, you just can’t wait? Yes, and we can generate that for ourselves. And that’s what I call stepping into our power.
You’re that CEO, you’re that visionary of your own life, of your relationship with alcohol and how it’s going to benefit you in so many areas. But so many of us give in to those defeatist thoughts like I can’t do this or I don’t know what words, or I can’t articulate it or yeah, this isn’t going to work for me. But that’s so not true. That’s just language being used against your brain. It’s not powerful at all. And with practice you can learn to do this for yourself. That’s all it takes, practice. But have that willingness to explore.
We’re going to start with words and start with words and choose them and how does that feel? Does that feel like where I want to be and where I want to go? And how does that sit within my body and my brain? I think we’re just such in a hurry to get to the action that we forget the vision along the way. And the vision is really important. Ask anybody wanting change in their life, an entrepreneur, a creator, a visionary, whether you make art or jewelry, you always start with a vision.
Yes, you take action but you also have a vision in your mind because the vision is such a powerful piece of the process. And here’s what I love about vision is that it’s such a powerful way to communicate what you want to yourself. And when you communicate powerfully of what you want to yourself you know what you’re telling yourself? That you matter, that you are important, that your desires are important.
So please don’t use defeatist words when you’re communicating the vision of what you want because words turn into thoughts, thoughts turn into feelings, feelings turn into actions. So without the right words we might not be getting the right actions, which means we’re not getting the right results. So I will never talk to myself and say, “It’s a slippery slope or I fell off the wagon.” I have to remind us, there’s no wagons anymore unless they’re in museums. We drive cars now. There’s no falling off any wagons.
And slippery slopes, they’re at mountains and places where it’s cold, there’s no slippery slopes here in San Diego. So I’m not going to use these words and I stopped using these words with myself because they never painted the vision of where I wanted to go. And once I stopped allowing these words into my brain, guess what happened? I stopped having slippery slopes. I stopped falling off wagons that didn’t really exist. I stopped overdrinking because I was no longer putting that GPS there for my brain.
I was using powerful words, CEO words so I could stay in control of my drinking. And here’s another one I find a lot of the ladies will say and I used to say it too that, “Once I start drinking I can’t stop.” Yeah, that may have been true in the past but the more you say it in your present the more likely it is to occur in your future. So why would I say words today that I don’t want to be true tomorrow? Why would I put a GPS in my brain today that I don’t want my brain to use in the future? That thought is not useful.
My brain knows what I’ve done in my past. I don’t have to talk about it anymore. What my brain needs to hear is me communicating the vision of where we’re going and how we’re going to get there. I need the vision. I need the tactics. I need the strategy. I need to look at the data.
And I need to understand when and how I’m going to pivot because I want to execute powerfully for myself, for my relationship with drinking to show up as the woman I want to be. To be that woman who can take it or leave it, powerfully with confidence and always in control. And guess what? Now I love stopping. I love saying no to another drink because I love honoring my health and I love honoring my body.
And I love not having desire for the next drink, making it so easy to say no, because I love myself more than I love my wine, because I am the CEO of my drinking and I always will be because I want to be, because I choose to be, because I matter and I am important. And that’s freedom to me my friends. And these options are available to you. Allow yourself to live a healthier more meaningful, more powerful life. And with that I leave you to be the CEO of your drinking.
Alright my friends, that’s what I have for you today. And hey, if you’re loving what you’re hearing on this podcast, would you kindly go and leave me a review? It’s really important to me for you to leave a review because it means other people will find this podcast. And I hope to help so many women change their relationship with alcohol. So if you do that for me I’d be so appreciative. Alright, thank you for tuning in and I will see you next week.
Thanks for listening to Drink Less Lifestyle. If you’re ready to change your relationship with drinking now check out the free guide, How to Effectively Break the Overdrinking Habit at sherryprice.com/startnow. See you next week.